Artist Living

Walking into a New World: My Dad

Me Ra Koh

It is Monday afternoon, June 21st.  I’m sitting in the hospital cafeteria.  We have been here for seven days.  The days have meshed together that sometimes it feels like we just got here and other times a single day feels like a year.

At 11:30am, last Monday, I was on the phone with my brothers.  We were planning a surprise Father’s Day gift—a round of golf at one of his favorite courses.  Little did we know that at the same time he was getting out of his car along the side of the road.

His car had never had any problems but for some reason, it had stopped running that day.  He pulled over as far as he could in the right lane.  There was no shoulder.  He turned his hazard lights on, got out of his car, opened his trunk to grab his flares…and then his life changed forever.

Four cars spotted my dad and his open trunk.  They signaled and went around him.  But the fifth car didn’t see him.  A 17 year old girl was looking down and didn’t see the prior cars move.  She didn’t see my dad’s car stopped, his trunk open, his body standing there.  Her car hit him at 40 mph.  My dad’s body was crushed between her car and his own.  He was thrown back onto her windshield and then hit the ground.

When I got to the hospital, the ER trauma doctor said the he needed to show someone in the family a picture of my dad’s left leg, so that we understood the severity of his injuries.  I will never forget that picture.

Within the hour, my dad was flown to Harborview Medical  Hospital.  We were told that once the major arteries have been severed in someone’s leg, the doctors have six hours to work.  Every second counts.  That first hour at Harborview felt like the longest hour of my life.  I will never forget the surgeons coming in to tell us they were no longer trying to save his leg but his life.  The world stopped.  And yet, somehow it has gone forward.  Somehow that single hour has stretched into seven days, and my dad is still going, just in case I was prepared with a service online from www.the-medical-negligence-experts.co.uk, since sometimes negligence happens and people get worse or die.

There are moments of this last week that I will never forget.  Sitting by his bedside in ICU, reading him the Psalms, “Where can I go from Your Spirit?  Where can I flee from Your presence?  If I ascend into heaven,, You are there.  If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there…though I walk in the midst of trouble, You will revive me.  You will stretch out your hand to me…” God, my heart whispers, stretch out your hand to me too.  I am desperate to know you are here. I keep reading, believing that wherever my dad is, somehow His spirit can hear the words he has stood on all these years.

Family arrives.  The moment of seeing his brother and baby sister, my Korean aunt and uncle, walk into ICU, stand on either side of him and weep.  They have walked through the Korean war together; they know how to survive wars.  Weeping is part of the surviving.

Watching my mom be so strong, signing consent waiver after consent waiver before every new surgery.  Existing in this land of unknowns and still choosing to believe in the impossible.  And then in the darkness of our hotel room, I wake to the sound of her crying.  She is alone in the bathroom.  I am thankful that the gentle spirit of Grief is with her in the wee hours of the morning, giving her a space to let tears flow freely, uninterrupted.

I’ve watched the tubes breathe air into his lungs.  I’ve listened to him groan.  I’ve wiped the blood from his body and listened to the foreign beeping of ICU machines, telling us his body is still fighting.  I’ve sat in the hallway outside his room and cried because my father is a giant.  I don’t have a grid for seeing him this helpless.  I don’t have a grid for any of this.

It is like my family has been existing in multiple worlds at once—worlds that make me dizzy from how fast they spin.  There is the world of not knowing what the next surgery will bring.  There is the world of dealing with insurance companies, liabilities, policy plans and the police.  There is the world of trying to navigate through the hospital cafeteria at lunch—we learned quickly that you don’t get a sandwich without filling out the slip.  There is the world of missing my own babies and Brian, as I sleep in the hotel room with my mom and brothers.  There is a world of anticipation that can sometimes squeeze the breath out of me—how will my dad handle the news of his leg?  What will his life be like?  What will the next surgery tell us?  How does one walk with all the spinning surrounding us?   Sometimes it is not one day at a time but three minutes.

It was 41 years ago today that this photo was taken.  My dad had said goodbye to his family and was walking into a new world of life: he was moving to America with big dreams and one small briefcase that carried two pairs of underwear, an English dictionary and his Bible.

My dad has been through more trials than anyone I know.  He is a tough, determined man.  When he was first brought into the ER, the doctors wrote in his chart that he was 45 years old.  He is 66.  He doesn’t have a single wrinkle and has zero percent body fat.  He is all muscle.  He has traveled out of the country for business for over thirty five years.  He flies from Seattle to China and the first thing he does is a workout of low weights, high reps and a little cardio.  He did his best skiing this year and loves a good game of golf.

The accident cost him his lower left leg, a broken right leg, fractures to his head, and a lower spine fracture.  But not his life.  Not his mind.  Not his spirit.  When he woke up after four days of being out, he looked at me and my brothers and said, “We must stay encouraged.  Do not be proud but stay humble because who knows how tomorrow will change our life.”  And then he drifted back to sleep.

He woke later on and squeezed my hand.  He said my name the way only my daddy does, “Meeda, it’s been a tough three months for our family.”  He pauses.  His eyes are too swollen to open.  I think of the day I cried on the phone with him.  The kids, Brian and I were in Thailand, thousands of miles away, sick from the Dengue Fever—only three months ago.  Is the helpless feeling that I’ve had all week, the helplessness he felt?  Yes, it has been a tough three months.  He tells me to stay rooted in hope—I remember our talk.

It was only a month ago.  We had dinner—just the two of us.  He told me that all three of his kids have special gifts.  I asked him what my gift was.  He told me that I was created to move people with my words.  This was not only a gift but a special calling and with it comes great responsibility.  He tells me it is important that I stay rooted in hope, life, and the impossible being possible.  He squeezes my hand as I stand next to his hospital bed, “We stay rooted in hope Meeda.  It has been a long three months, but we do not lose hope.”

Two days pass.  He is now conscious enough to hear the news that we have dreaded telling him.  The doctor begins to explain to him what happened, the severity of the accident and injuries.  The doctor tells him that there was no way to save his left leg.  I watch my dad close his eyes and turn his head to the window light.  I cannot go to this place of loss that he is feeling.  He must go alone.

Forty one years ago he walked into a new world with his briefcase.  Forty one years later my dad is walking into a new world again.  It is a world of learning how to live without his left leg.  My brother wants to teach him how to ski on one leg.  My dad is encouraged to hear that he will be not only be able to walk again but golf too.  It will be a process of more surgeries, determined physical therapy and taking life one day at a time.

I stand in the doorway of his hospital room.  He looks at me.  I can tell by the gentleness in his eyes that his spirit is quiet this morning.  He looks at his missing leg.  “My left foot hurts, Meeda.  It’s so tight.  I want to untie my shoe, but I look and there isn’t any shoe.”  He shakes his head baffled by this new pain called Phantom Limb.  He lifts his hands and gently touches the staples in his head.  He rests his hand at his side and turns to me.  A soft smile unfolds.  “God must not be done with me yet Meeda.  He must not be done.”

No, he’s not Ahba.  I am so thankful that He’s not.

_________________________________________________________

To all our family, friends, blog readers, twitter followers, everyone;

Thank you for all your prayers this week.  I want you to know that your emails, direct Twitter messages, text messages, and voicemails have not been lost in a black hole.  They have come to me as I sat next to my dad’s bed in ICU.  They have come at night as I cry in the hallway.  They have come as I sit and stare out the window, too tired to know where to go from here.  Every time they have come, I have felt a gentle reminder that God has put us on your heart.  That He is near.

To come: A handful of wonderful friends and talented photographers have offered to write some special blogs posts for me over the next two weeks.  They are going to bring you their experiences, their expertise, their humor, their stories, their photo tips, and keep our community fed while I tend to my dad and family.  I hope you are blessed by all the wonderful posts they are going to bring you this week and next.  I will pop on here when I have a window of space.

Many of you have emailed and asked how you can help.  Your prayers mean more than I can ever express.  My dad’s spirit seems to be held in the hands of God this last week.  He is sad at times but positive also.  Today, he asked for people to pray that he would have a growing understanding of God’s grace in his life, instead of only the loss of his leg.

If you live locally, we could use meals.  I will be making the transition to coming home but still be up at the hospital during the day for his upcoming surgeries.  A meal that Brian and I could freeze or have for dinner would help us so much.  If this is something that doesn’t burden you, email us a day or time you can stop by.  We will have someone forward you our address.  Email info@fioria.us.  (If we are unable to visit when you stop by, please don’t be offended or hurt.  We appreciate your support and understanding so much.)

Thank you for being here today, the last seven days and days to come.  Thank you for putting my dad on your church prayer lists, asking friends to pray, forwarding my twitter updates, emailing me, and for stopping in the craziness of your own life to ask for a miracle with us.  The surgeons said he had a 20% chance of living when he was flown in.  It is a miracle that he didn’t lose his life.  We have a long road ahead of us, but we have the road—and that makes all the difference.

with much heartfelt love,

meeda  🙂

Share:

  1. aileen says:

    what a beautiful post. hugs to you and to your family. you all have been and are in our prayers. daily. peace to your soul and may your father continue to feel God’s grace in his life. xo aileen

  2. claudia says:

    My heart was heavy when I read your post. I’m so sorry for all the pain and the sorrow you and your family have to go through – especially your Dad. He sounds like a wonderful person. I’m not the praying kind but I will keep your father in my thoughts. You are an amazingly strong person. He is lucky to have you. All the best to you.

  3. Tiffany says:

    Your family is in my prayers. god bless

  4. Georgia says:

    Your dad was right about your gift. And I have been blessed by it. Thank you. What a gift is a father who knows what he believes and stands firmly on it. It is a rare thing. I’m sorry for your life shattering loss, but I am so so grateful with you that he is alive. I will be lifting him up.

    Love,
    Georgia
    P.S. “Mercy Me”‘s Psalm 139 is a beautiful and encouraging song- that no matter what new place we find ourselves in… He is there.

  5. Sandy says:

    MeRa,
    my heart goes out to you and your family! I began crying and can’t stop! I willl be praying for all of you!!

  6. s.patel says:

    your family is in my thoughts

  7. CA says:

    Wow. I will have to re-read this later to fully process, but my first reaction is: what a strong and deeply rooted father you have. Thank you for sharing with us. And my family and I continue to offer up prayers for strength, knowledge and healing.

  8. Kalli says:

    Me Ra, Thank you for sharing your words, your story, your fears with us. I have been so worried about your father, you, Brian and your beautiful children. It was amazing to read about your father’s spirit and hope. He can move mountains and is an absolute inspiration.

    I am just over the bridge – I’ll be in touch with Genie. Thank you for posting – I have been hoping to help in some small way. xxxooo Kalli, Seattle Sista 09

  9. Thank you so much Me Ra for sharing your heart! Still praying for you, your dad, your mom, and brothers! For the surgeons hands as they continue to operate.

    Praying for Peace and comfort! For your dad to understand and accept God’s grace! What a blessing his life is!

  10. MiaS says:

    My prayers are with your father, you and your family right now.

  11. Me Ra……… a beautiful post. I love you.

  12. Lynda Kennedy says:

    beautiful … so thankful you found time to write … to find healing for your soul and to continue to let your gift flow. what a precious family you have been blessed with. still praying for you & your dad.. wish i lived in your area so i could help in practical ways … prayer is my link for now.

  13. Gina says:

    Oh, Mera, I can’t stop crying. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

  14. Gail says:

    Praying for you and your family Me Ra. What a beautiful post you’ve written in honor of your dad.

  15. Jen MacNiven says:

    Meeda, ( I love that!)
    Thank you so much for sharing…so beautifully too! I can not imagine all the emotions you all are going through, but you all are SO strong and have taken on everything life throws at you with such a great spirit. I KNOW that this has forever changed your family…but I can see it turning into a miraculous journey. I totally invision your dad, being the giant he is, doing so well with PT…getting a new leg and showing the world he can still walk, golf, ski and climb mountains. You will blog about his journey, and find interest in others with similar ‘abilities’. You will document those lives, have featured stories (especially your dad’s), write a book. Your dad will be an even bigger GIANT and show the world he’s unstopable. God is NOT done with him and infact, has so much more life for him and your family. Granted, this will all be done, one NEW step at a time.

    God bless you all! Big hugs to you and please give one to your dad for me too.
    Love you,
    Jen

  16. Melissa says:

    MeRa,

    your dad and family are in our prayers. His story is truly inspiring, I love the image you posted… So beautiful. He sounds like a kind and loving father, you are so blessed to have him in your lives. Hugs to you all!

  17. tammy ludlow says:

    Thanks for being vulnerable and sharing your heart Me Ra. You and your family are amazing and your dad is such a strong man! I will continue to pray and I know that your blog will be such an important part to your healing and so good for all of us as well.

    Love and prayers
    Tammy Ludlow

  18. Christy says:

    Your words are so beautiful and tender, my heart pours out to you and your family.

    My prayers are with you all at this time.

  19. karen casey says:

    MeRa, I am in tears as I read this. 1. Because of the pain your father and your family are in and 2. Because of the strength I know you have. So I guess you have figured out what I do for a living as a respiratory therapist in the most unfortunate way. All our prayers are with you and your family.

  20. Melissa says:

    What a beautiful post, MeRa. Your dad and family will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.

  21. Kellie says:

    For all of us there is a journey. We don’t know it till we are on the path, and even then our decisions can lead us down a different trail. It is what we see, hear, feel and taste on those journey’s that teach us who we are and what we can accomplish. It is in these choices we make to like, dislike, listen or speak that allow us to grow and flourish.

    Thank you for taking this time, this special moment of sharing to allow us to feel connected with you and your family, your dad in his and your time of need.
    Blessed Be?

  22. linda says:

    MeRa,

    I am full of tears and I am at a loss of words to express the pain I feel for all of you. You Dad sounds like an amazing person who has inspired many..a gift perhaps that will keep on giving. My thoughts prayers and virtual hugs are with you all.

  23. Theresa Bastian says:

    Me Ra…it is a blessing that your family can be together in this time of transition. It’s been 10 years since my dad suffered a massive stroke, losing the use of his right side. I completely relate to your words that you don’t have a grid for seeing your dad helpless. And I can tell you with certainty that he will accomplish things in his recovery that you can’t now imagine, and you will find reserves within you that you can’t now imagine. And life, glorious life, will continue…with your dad in it. Our whole family is holding yours in our prayers and will continue to long after this sideways world of trauma fades to slow recovery. We love you and please give your mom our love too.

  24. sonya says:

    i barely took a breath while i read that. i can only imagine how many breaths you have skipped this week. i am praying that you will allow god to breath for you when you can do it on your own. that you would allow god to smile for you when you can’t smile on your own, and accept the comfort of gods embrace.
    i am praying for your mommy too. i am sad we dont live closer – i am sure brian would like my enchiladas.
    psalms 27 13-14
    I believe that I shall see the
    goodness of the Lord
    in the land of the living!
    Wait for the Lord;
    be strong, and let your heart
    take courage;
    yea, wait for the Lord!

  25. Lisa Novitsky says:

    MeRa
    : I will continue to pray. This post is so beautiful, so powerful…a wonderful way for you to honor your father. I am humbled by the profound grace your family is not only seeking, but finding.

  26. Danny says:

    I think throughout the years we have all forgotten how truly strong our parents are; maybe it just seemed normal to us.

    I have to tell you that your dad is absolutely amazing. Seeing how strong he has been throughout the last week has not only been inspiring but has really changed my outlook on life. Samchoon has truly touched my soul and that is something that I will carry with me for the rest of my life. We are all truly blessed that we have him in our lives to be a strong example and to guide us. He is an amazing man.

    MeRa, you are doing a tremendous job.. your father is very lucky to have a daughter like you. I will keep praying everyday for a quick recovery and of course, I am here for you guys

  27. Rhonda says:

    Thank you for sharing this. I continue to pray.
    Love you!

  28. Janice (San Diego) says:

    MeRa, I’m thinking of you and your family. It sounds like your dad is very strong and will get through this. I continue to be involved with the Challenged Athletes Foundation (CAF) out here in San Diego, whereby the loss of a leg or two…or all limbs never means not being able to live life to the fullest. I know the likes of Sarah Reinertsen, Scout Bassett and Andy Bailey. If there’s anything you need, please let me know.

  29. Linda says:

    Your father and your family are in my thoughts. You really do have a great gift with your writing.

  30. Melisa says:

    MeRa, I am thinking of all of you. Thank you, for being so open and sharing this. I will continue praying for all of you.

  31. You and your dad are in my thoughts.

  32. Sue Christianson says:

    Wow! MeRa, thank you so much for taking to time to write when I know you are absolutely exhausted. As I sit here trying to work but taking the time to read this, crying or really (sobbing) as I read the beautiful writings of a daughter that loves her Dad so much and that is so thankful for his life! Your Dad is so right! You are created to move people with your words. The thing is MeRa, you take the time to do so. You don’t keep your giftings and talents to yourself. You touch and change lives with the talents and giftings God has given you! That’s what it’s all about!

    We are continuing to pray for your family! I will email. I would be more than happy to bring a meal!
    Love you guys so much!

    Sue

  33. me ra … i’ve been praying all week and will continue. in the midst of tragedy, what beautiful faith lies beneath … i will pray God continues to reveal this faith and grace to you all …

  34. Me ra…
    You have such a beautiful spirit. I was moved by your words and pray that you continue in your strength that God has given you. Wish I could bring you a meal or two but I think it wouldn’t last a trip across the country! You are in my prayers!

  35. Amanda Key says:

    Me Ra,
    Praying for you dad, your family. I am so sorry for what he is going through. Much love to you and your family.

  36. Samantha says:

    Your dad and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

  37. Donna says:

    What a wonderfully stronge family! And you fantastic writings makes it all so real. Many prayers for you and your entire family.

  38. Anita Lam says:

    Me ra: Amazing! Keep up the good spirits and we will continue to pray for you and your family.

  39. Marla-Dee says:

    MeRa,

    I am always so touched by your words and amazed at the way you have found strength in these past three months. I will continue my prayers for you, your dad and family. This was, indeed, a beautiful way to honor your Dad. ?

    Hugs, hugs, hugs and moooooore hugs

  40. Cathy Mores says:

    Oh, Me Ra, we continue to lift up our hearts and minds in prayer for the road ahead. Your dad is a wise, strong, gentle man. We are sending our love.

  41. Kawehi says:

    I am here for you and would love to bring a meal – let mom and dad know they are on the prayer chain…love you all.

  42. Idie A says:

    I haven’t been able to get your family out of my mind this week. I will continue to pray and hope for the best for all of you!!
    xoxo

  43. Brian says:

    Meeda,
    Honey,
    Thanks for this beautiful post
    for sharing windows of your experience
    and for offering our thanks.

  44. Beautiful post. I’m so glad that the news is encouraging.

  45. Natalie Johnson says:

    Mera, Through tears we all celebrate the life of your father. He is right, there is more for him to do here on earth for God. My first thought when my father died suddenly was this does not happen to me, not to my family, but it did. I know it has been a blur of unbelief for a week that your family is going through this tragedy. I also know God is a big God and will be with you all each tiny step of the healing process. We as a family are praying and even my husband is keeping up with the post to see how your father is doing. I am so glad you are letting people help bring meals. I will be in contact. Love to you all, and keep resting in the Father’s arms.

  46. lora says:

    Mera, I’m so sorry for you and for your Dad. I will be praying for him and for your family. Thank you for sharing. We love you! ~Lora

  47. Misty says:

    ***WANT TO HELP?***
    Hi all,
    I will be coordinating all meal/gift arrangements for the family. If you would like to contribute in any way, please email me at themistified@yahoo.com, and I can give you more info. (If you have already emailed Me Ra or Genie, you will be receiving more information from me soon!)

    Thank you so much for your outpouring of love and support!

    Misty

  48. Tamara Young says:

    I admire your strength and that of your Father and family. You are all in my thoughts and prayers.

  49. Matt says:

    Thinking and praying for Peter and your family!

  50. Amanda Mays says:

    Gorgeously written Me ra! Your gift of words is a special gift, beyond measure! How beautifully and eloquently you tell this story even as you are living through it now is amazing! You are strong and brave and beautiful inside and out! How lucky your father is to have a daughter like you and how incredibly lucky you are to have him! His story is definitely not finished, god has great plans and many lessons left for all of you! My hand will continue to rest on your shoulder filled with prayers, love and support for your whole family!

    With love,
    Amanda

    Misty- emailing right now!

  51. Kristy says:

    Beautiful tribute to your dad Me Ra…his life, strength, and current battle.
    We’re fighting for him too, with our prayers.
    Love you friend,
    Kristy (Todd, Abby, and Wyatt too, and just found out… #3 on the way)
    Would love to connect when you’re up for it, but will give you all the time you need…

  52. Nickie Mullin says:

    Mera, I have tears in my eyes as I read your post. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I wish I was closer to be of more help but know that I’m thinking of you often.

  53. Patience says:

    Thank you Papa. It is because of you that wants to give people like me a slap on the face. We have nothing to complain, whine, be angry, hateful, bitter about yet we do.

  54. Renee says:

    Beautiful Meeda, 🙂
    Our hearts and prayers are with you, your Ahba, and your family.
    Sending you healing thoughts, hugs, and love. xoxo

  55. bouncy says:

    My thoughts are with you.

  56. Jennifer says:

    As I started to read your post, I was so upset by the tragedy that your family is going through and my only thought was “How terrible!” But as I continued to read, I was moved by the way God is working in your family. I know that it is so hard to understand when things like this happen, but it is so true that God has a plan for your father and your family. He is there for all of you every step of the way, even when it seems so incredibly hard to be strong. I will keep all of you in my prayers and I know that God will lead you all through this difficult time. Isaiah 41:10

  57. Patti O'Brien Prince says:

    What a loving tribute to your Dad. You and your family continue to b in my thoughts and prayers.

  58. Jane says:

    My son (now 16) was hit by a van (he was a pedestrian) 2 years ago. The bones in his leg were shattered, and 4 surgeries later he is walking and medically he is done. He has his whole world and future to look forward to. While not a necessarily good student prior, he is now an honor student and has dreams of maybe becoming a doctor. Your dad also has his whole world and future to look forward to, and luckily part of that world in your beautiful nature and loving heart. Sometimes hard to believe, but one must try to…. that there are no accidents in life…but opportunities. What your father’s God given opportunity will be will be told in the years ahead. Treasure him and your family and know my family’s prayers and thoughts are with you. Lots of love.

  59. Me Ra,

    Words cannot express how much sympathy I feel for your father, you, and your family. I am keeping you all in my thoughts and in my heart. Having a road does make all the difference in the world, and everyone is rooting for you.

    <3 Michelle

  60. Julie Watts says:

    I just love Jen McNiven’s vision for the future, Me Ra….it’s beautiful. Just breathe and keep snuggling into the love around you until you feel like stretching. Misty I’ll be emailing you too.

  61. Tessa says:

    Me Ra, I have no words… Your father sounds like an incredible man!! My thoughts are with you. {{HUGS}} from San Diego.

  62. Jessica N. says:

    I learned about this earlier today and am SO sorry to hear you are going through this nightmare. I am praying for your father and your family. Your father is incredibly strong and inspiring. Praise be to God for his survival.

  63. Sandra Fillmore says:

    Me Ra, That was absolutely beautiful.

    Thank you so much for sharing you and your family’s story. I will be praying for y’all, and would love to be blessed with the honor or bringing a meal by. I remember what a profound and basic gesture that is when needed. You are a beautiful beautiful soul.

  64. Judith says:

    Me Ra,

    Your Ahba is right. Your words are touching and meaningful as well as beautiful. Thank you for sharing and please remember that I am praying for you, your family and your father.

  65. Amanda says:

    Praying for continued strength for you and your family. God Bless…

  66. Valerie says:

    Me Ra, I am praying for you, your family, your Dad and those around you. This life takes many mysterious twists and turns. I know one thing for sure, God is with all of you every step of the way, he was with your Dad at that accident site, with the Drs and now with all the therapists. Remember that he never leaves it is just there might be times you don’t feel him as strong but he is always there.
    What a blessing your family is…we are out of town but I will be keeping in touch to see if you still need meals when we return, until then I will pray.
    Valerie

  67. denise karis says:

    Me Ra, I absolutely fell in love with your dad when I saw that video years ago – about the tiger? was that it? He was wonderful! And then I heard the story about his saying Brian looked just like Brad Pitt! SO funny.

    Im sure youve heard it a million times, “Your dad is awesome!”

    And he so so so is. This story is so heartbreaking but so encouraging. That there was no period of doubt – he had hope and faith right away and encouraged his children to cling to hope… Me Ra – I am so so sorry for the pain and worry youre feeling and for the new pain your father is in. We are sending prayers your way and looking forward to the post with photos of him skiing again. a million x’s and o’s to you and your dad and your family.

  68. Laurie says:

    You and you family are in my thoughts and prayers. When my husband was in an accident in Feb. I remember that prayers from all over the world were exactly what I needed most.

  69. […] for her dad, her mom, and their entire family.  If you haven’t read Me Ra’s post honoring her father, you MUST!  It’s just beautiful.  In the midst of such a heavy shift in their lives’, […]

  70. May every tender mercy available to man be blessed upon your father, and his amazing family.

  71. Echo says:

    Me Ra,

    I know where you are. There is nothing harder than seeing your father in his most vulnerable moments of life. Just inches away from death. My father doesn’t know Jesus and I pray every day that he does. Your father knows the Lord and for that I am already confident that God is going to work great miracles in his healing, more abundantly than what he has already done. I speak it!

    May the Lord shine his love upon you, praying for you and your family.

    Echo

  72. MeRa, I said a prayer this morning for your dad, family and for the girl who hit your dad. This post is unbelievable powerful. Thanks for letting us in. We’ll keep the prayers rolling.

  73. jess says:

    you do have a gift of words…beautiful post, Me Ra. thank you so much for sharing your heart with all of us. i wish i lived closer…i would definitely bring you food! still thinking about & praying for you and your family…. love, jess

  74. For the past day I have been looking for just the right thing to say to you. The right words to comfort you, the right prayer to heal, the right prayer of Hope. I read this today, and it really felt right. This is what I have been wanting to say. It’s from a church service/sermon video called “Rain” that Lara Casey shared today and it felt so perfect to share with you:

    “Things don’t always work out the way we want them to, or the way we think they will. Sometimes we don’t even see it coming. We get hit with some form of pain out of nowhere leaving us feeling desperate and helpless. That’s the way life is. Still, it makes us wonder how God can let these things happen to us. How God can just stand by and watch us suffer. Where is God when it really hurts? Maybe God is actually closer to us than we think. Maybe it’s when we’re in these situations, where everything seems to be falling apart, that God gets an opportunity to remind us of how much He really loves us.”

    In my own prayers, I pray that you feel God’s Love. I pray that you all feel Hope… Hope and Peace and Understanding.
    Much Love, Carrie

  75. Diane says:

    Thank you for sharing your heart Me Ra. You do have a beautiful gift. I loved reading your post, and just wanted you to know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I’m sorry for all your pain. Its a new road, and the beginning of a new journey. Sending you lots of positive energy.
    big hugs,
    diane

  76. Julie says:

    Me Ra,
    Praying for you, your dad and your whole family during this difficult time. I pray that the generosity and kindness you and Brian pour out will be coming your direction as you walk through this unthinkable journey. May God bless you all and wrap His arms of healing, mercy, strength and peace around each of you. He will be more than enough – somehow, someway, He will.

  77. Teresa Storer-Savage says:

    Me Ra & Family,

    “Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us and eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

    And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7

    I am praying that you will experience that PEACE that passes ALL of your understanding. That you will feel the arms of our Lord holding tightly onto you, your Dad and your entire family during this difficult time.

    Love to you, Teresa

  78. Dearest Me Ra, your Father and family…

    I had a long message typed to you comment spacer here, but somehow when I pressed submit, it erased instead of posting.

    Please know that what you are going through and your Father keeps me praying hard every day, through out each day.
    Your Father’s words of inspiration to you while he is suffering such a tragic loss is amazing.

    Now I know where you get your divine inspiration from…Your Dear Father.
    May you all be blessed and comforted, strengthened, and have the ability to mobilize your inner spiritual army to fight the way through to the unbroken road to complete victory, giving you all a gift of gold, tried in the fire because, 1 Peter 1:7 (KJV) “That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth , though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honor and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ.”

    Isaiah 61:1,2c,3 also states that “The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon Me…
    To comfort all who mourn, To console those who mourn in Zion,
    To give them beauty for ashes, The oil of joy for mourning,
    The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness;
    That they may be called trees of righteousness,
    The planting of the LORD, that He may be glorified.” (NKJV)

    Wishing I could give you a giant comforting hug in person,
    but I can only offer heavy prayer cover and a song called “Cover Me” that I love so much that I took a photo that reminded me of the song…I hope it encourages you too!
    Here is the link…It’s the first song that plays: http://blog.simplydivinephotography.com/2010/06/cover-me.html

    Love and hugs,
    Susan Reynolds
    Orangevale, CA

  79. Margaret says:

    MeRa, I am praying for your family too. Such a beautiful written post. I was moved to the serious kind of tears.

  80. jeramy says:

    my dear friend. i’m just getting back to life…and reading this for the first time. your words bring tears to my eyes. we are far away in geography only. God’s church is big and isn’t bound by the things we are bound to. i know the feeling of time standing still and know that in these tough times, our friends, family, and community are the real glue that hold us together. we are with you, brian and the kids. hang in there…see you soon!

  81. Susan Moroch says:

    MeRa; this is one of your Mom’s college friends. Marsha and I were roommates in the dorm. We were even at your 1st birthday party in Eugene. I am so sorry and pray that your Dad willy recover quickly. Your Dad and Mom and all of you will be in our thoughts and prayers daily.

  82. Michelle says:

    Thinking of you and your family. You are in my prayers.

  83. Aleida Booker says:

    My Sweet Me Ra,

    I love you and love this post. Thank you for sharing a tragic incident in such a beautiful way. I can hear your dad’s voice and see his sweet smile when you refer to his words to you. I can see how he looks at you with his gentle eyes that have been through so much. I can hear that tone that he gets when he speaks about you, to you.

    My family and I are praying for all of you and my children remind me to pray again each time we see your mom’s beautiful face (which is often, living in Steilacoom, with many listings!). They ask me to tell them about the first time your dad met Darryl and learned that my baby was part Korean. Your dad gave him a special Korean name and prayed over him. So many memories…and this new story will be his best one yet. Your dad is right, God is not done with him yet.

    Love you and your family much!

    ~Aleida

  84. Piper says:

    This is the first time I’ve been to your lovely blog. I came over from the link on Tracey Clark’s post and so touched by this post. Please know that I will keep you, your father and your family in my thoughts.
    XO Piper

  85. […] Things are calming down a bit as her father’s condition is stabilizing.  There are more procedures and surgeries happening but at least there is healing taking place as well. If you don’t know what happened you can read her blog from last week. […]

  86. Oh Me Rah, I just saw this, I am in tears. My mother was in the hospital for the past month, had major heart surgery and they found lung cancer – I am totally feeling this with you.

    All the best to you, your father and your family.

  87. Our thoughts and prayers are with everyone in your family. I can’t even begin to imagine the strength needed for all of you.

  88. Kim Curran says:

    sorry, sweetie….

  89. My thoughts are with you and your family during this time…and your dad is right, you do move people with your words…it’s a rare gift to have, and you hold onto that!

  90. Andrea Quinn says:

    Hello Me Ra, I am new to your site, blog and we have yet to meet, but my friend who is a photographer in Minneapolis told me about you, so I’ve been trying to figure out a way to attend one of your workshops sometime in Seattle.

    Anyway, your words about your father brought tears to my eyes, as I sit here at work and read your beautiful and eloquent post. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and your experience. You, your dad and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

    Please take care, and I hope to meet you in person someday soon.

    Andrea Quinn

  91. Christine says:

    Me Ra, you and your family are in my thoughts, I can’t do much from where I am but send my love and support through the next few months of recovery for your Dad. All the best ? Christine

  92. Love love love to you, your father, and your family my beautiful friend! My thoughts and energy is with you all!

  93. Debbie says:

    Me Ra, I just read your post and my heart is sadden for what your father and family are going through.
    In your words, there is so much faith and hope. You are a daughter who for now, has to be the strong one, not just for your dad, but for your mom too.
    The role is not an easy one, but one you have taken on with the grace and love that God has placed inside of you…
    In your fathers words there is strength. He fines that strength in the same place you do. Through your love for God, knowing that whatever happens each day, that God is the one that is in control.
    We never really know or understand why bad things happen. Our human nature wants to be in control and take care of everything. Circumstances may have changed your dads life, as he knew it.. but like you said, he is alive.. he is here and like your dad said… God isn’t finished with him yet..
    That foundation that your family has, will be the strength you will need in the days and months ahead. It will be what gives you peace when times are tough. Love when you feel alone and helpless. It will be Gods love, that will surround you and hold you up and carry you when times are hard. When you and your dad feel alone.. It will be Gods love that takes you in his arms and gives you the reassurance that you are never really alone. It will be that Love that will carry your dad through his fight back, through the pain, through the therapy, through the learning to live again.
    Your dad seems like a remarkable man… and he raised an equally remarkable daughter..
    We are praying for you Me Ra, for your dad and mom and family.
    May God continue to show his blessings, love, peace and strength.

  94. Tanya says:

    MeRa
    I was shocked and saddened to hear about your father’s accident. Relieved about his survival. Amazed and encouraged about his strength and courage – as well as your own. I hope and pray for a speedy rehabilitation and that he may get out on that golf course again.
    much love
    the burdicks

  95. tawyna says:

    I’ve been to your blog a few times before; strange that I’m brought here by this post. I could relate to so much of this, even though my father’s sickness was different and unfortunately he didn’t make it in the end. Most importantly, reading this post I was relieved and overjoyed to see that your father is holding on and has made it, albeit with the loss of a leg. I am happy for you that he is still there to hold your hand and say “We must stay encouraged”. Although my father has been gone over a year now, I must also stay encouraged. Thank you for sharing. I will continue to pray for your family.

  96. Kim Beladi says:

    YOU ARE AN INCREDIBLE WRITER. Your father is right. I am so glad to hear he is recovering. It is so inspiring to look at life and define character. I think you father sounds very wise. God is not done with him.
    Prayers

  97. Hol says:

    Me Ra, I’ve visited before but am just now reading this post. I was saddened to hear about your father, but I am glad just the same that he is doing better and still able to have a positive, faithful outlook over the whole situation. You, your father and the whole family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

  98. Dawn says:

    Me Ra,

    I am just now reading your post for the first time. I follow your blog and have been away for awhile. I am so sorry about your father’s accident. I hope and pray he is doing doing ok. I understand to some extent, having gone through a similar tradgedy with my nephew. It is heartwrenching to see a loved one go through this…and you go through it with them the best you know how. May a peace be with you and your family and the spirit of God lay a healing hand on your father and to him a speedy recovery as well…I pray.

    I get a sense from your post that tells me where you get your strength and will power! He is right about your gift! You have a way with words that shows a beauty and kindness about you and I have never met you, but I can feel it! I have loved that about your blog and always feel drawn to come back! 🙂

    I will keep you and your family in my prayers!

  99. Melanie says:

    Beautiful and heartfelt words…We are people of faith, and who believe in the power of prayer and words…We don’t allow negative words to come into our lives. There is power in the tongue. So as I say that, I believe that your father is healed in the name of Jesus, that he is feeling no pain and that he is strengthened and back up walking with whatever means is necessary. He has doctors, and can hear their reports and say, thank you, but I will go to my Great Physician for my healing!

  100. […] of Ahba #3: Determination During week 3, it took my dad 15 minutes to move himself from the hospital bed to the wheelchair.  I remember one of his first […]

  101. joan benn says:

    MERA, WE KNOW THE LORD WAS WITH YOUR ABBA EVERY DAY AND NIGHT. “HE” WAS THE HANDS OF EVERY DR. 0R NURSE THAT CAME INCONTACT WITH HIM. NOW THINK OF WHAT IS HAPPENING TOMRROW——-HE’S GOING HOME :O))
    WHAT A BLESSING ,LIFE IS VERY PRECIOUS AND I KNOW THE LORD HAS MANY THINGS ON THIS MANLY EARTH FOR YOUR FATHER TO DO.. JUST THINK, HE WILL GET TO SEE PAS GRADUATE FROM COLLEGE,MAYBE WATCH BLAZE PLAY TENNIS AND OUR SWEET GRAYER??? WHO KNOWS, BECOME A SMALL APPLIANCE SALEMAN LIKE HIS DAD OR A NO FEAR PERSON LIKE HIS UNCLE SHAUN… THANKS MERA FOR HAVING SUCH A GIFT FOR MAKING US TO WANT TO READ MORE & MORE. GRANDMA LOVES YOU XX