Do I need to give up my dream?
Posted By: Lindsay
We are supposed to be talking about what is so in our year. The reality of what has happened. Get out… could Linda or Jen have done a better job??
So a week ago I wrote my Blog talking about riding the waves of life. Well that night brought high fevers and smacked me clean on my rear. I had to cancel two sessions, and give up on a promotional idea I was working on for Halloween.
Strep throat sat me on my bummer forcing me to take a back seat for a number of days and pray that my clients would be willing to reschedule.
It has been slow going since then and alas, another life event almost drowned me. My husband and I received shocking news that we may need to pay back an insane amount of money stemming from his head injury. I was sick to my stomach and heart broken. I feared that I would have to put aside everything that I have dreamed of and worked for in order to keep our family from loosing everything.
I shed many tears in that car ride in to talk to my husband. I ran through all the ways I could possibly help our family, and all I felt was this wave of disappointment and fear that my dreams had somehow put us in this position. I will do anything for my family and if it means giving up all my dreams to make sure we have a roof over our head and food on the table you better know I would do everything in my power.
With tears in my eyes and a blotchy read face I went in to see my husband. The amount of love and support that I felt the moment I saw his face made me smile despite my concern. In his amazing fashion he assured me we would be ok, and that “I did not have to give up my dreams”.
I don’t know how it will work out, but I feel blessed to have a husband that supports my dreams even when times are not the rosiest.
So what is so right now is…that I just shot pictures of two adorable newborns today and had a blast. I am feeling tons better, no more body aches and burning throat!! I got my house picked up, and cooked dinner. I am sitting on the sofa next to my husband and will go to bed in our newly floored room. My other canceled session is rescheduling, and my sons school is willing to pass out my belated gift bags. I wake up every morning loving what I do. I continue to pray that the money situation get worked out. And lastly I have laughed, and smiled today, thank God for that!!
Shine On,
Lindsay
Lin these are stunning photos, but the real jewel in this post is your honesty and your attitude. Thank you for sharing with us the hardships and heartaches you’ve experienced these past weeks. I am so sorry it’s been so rough. But I have been reminded over and over again that we have a God who’s called Jehovah Jireh – meaning God will Provide. And He will! He is oh so faithful! He’s the one who’s given you this dream and He will bring it to fruition, providing all you need and more. So no fear.
He’s got you in His Mighty Hand. Love you and am praying for you!!!!!!
These pictures are amazing Lindsay! And what more could be said as I believe Sika nailed it on the head. Take it one day at a time, girl. Heck – sometimes it’s one moment at a time – leaning on the One who called you to this and He will carry you through.
xoxo
*hugs*
I am happy that you were smiling today too!
I can SO relate to your feeling overwhelmed, and I sometimes have to do my “Chris check” I take my hand… lay it flat and place it about 1/2 inch away from my nose and mouth… I take a deep breath in… and let it out (the hand is there just to verify I am still breathing) So long as I am still breathing, everything else will work itself out! I just need to remember to stay calm and keep working towards what feels right.
I know, no matter what happens, I am a better person for having heard your story. You have changed many, and I am so glad you did.
PS (Personally, I think you are totally going to ROCK your photography business!)
Lindsay, I asked myself this very same question right before I attended the SF Confidence Workshop. I totally understand that place where you are. That place of being willing to give up “everything” at time even “yourself” to ensure that your family has everything they need. I am glad your husband provided you with the comfort that you needed to stay on course. Your wholeness is a part of the “Everything” they need. Your images are becomming more and more stunning and I see a definite style emerging. You will be a total hit in your photography business. Keep moving and rocking it girl! You are on your way!
Lindsay,
I keep thinking of that quote “Leap, and the net will appear.” I think you took a huge and brave leap in this post – sharing your true and vulnerable self…and I can see the net weaving stronger and stronger in your realizations, your husbands support and the encouragement of the women above.
P.S. I think you are going to ROCK your business too.
Onward!
Thank you all for your support!! Along with my husband and family it is amazing women like you that keep me keeping on!!
Love to All!!
Linds, you have no idea how much I relate to your words. I can’t wait for our time to talk tomorrow. I’m so proud of you for hanging in there. So thankful for your husband too. And so glad that your dreams were put in your heart by a much higher being than you!
Lindsay,
Thank you so much for sharing this. I know there are many times i feel this way too. Don’t be discouraged, hold on to your dream because it is who you are and what you are great at. Every time i see your photos i feel so captivated. You are an amazing photographer with love and passion for what you do…run with that! God gave you this gift of photography….consider it just that. Let this gift of yours open up for the world to see. I am so blessed that i am part of that world already
(((hugs))))
Lindsay,
I love your honesty – you speak from a place of strength and inner confidence now about your trials! You know that ALL of us – me for sure – can relate. Those moments of giving up on my self, diminishing, wiping my self aside in my great desire to Give to those I love.
Love your style in the photos now too! cool like you.